I’ll never forget my first audition.

Well, the first audition where I got the part.

My *actual* first audition, I totally blew it, and immediately erased it from my memory for all time 😉

Let’s get something clear: I have no acting experience, no acting education, no long lost actors in my family tree and no uncle that’s a director who’s been secretly preparing me for my acting debut.

My first successful audition, the audition where I got the role, was actually my second audition ever. In my life. Ever.

With no education, experience or innate inherited talent, I somehow nailed my second audition and got cast “on the spot” (according to the director).

I’ll never forget it.

So many things could have gone wrong…I could have stood on the right hand side, for example, and when the director said “Slate” I would have responded with: “Huh?”

But I didn’t. I stood on the left. Someone with experience or education or a great grandma who was in the first “talkies” stood on the right and when they said “Slate” she said “My name is (blah blah blah)”.

“Okay,” I thought to myself… “Slate means ‘Say your name'”.

My third audition didn’t go so well. I stood on the right. When they said “Slate and Profile” I said “Hi, I’m blah blah blah”. Then everyone looked at me, waiting. I looked to my left and thought “Doesn’t the person on my left know they’re supposed to go “Hi I’m blah blah blah”? Jeeeeez!”

But still…silence.

Then I hear “Ok now Profile”.

THEN I go “Huh?” and needless to say, I didn’t get that part 😉

The part I *did* get, was the role of a 23 year old mother. My TV daughter, Princess Taea, was dressed up in matching glasses, boots, jeans and sports coat. She was like my own mini me!

Here’s a video of us going up the escalator one of one million times:

We filmed in Tinseltown (yes, the movie theater) in Vancouver. I was the first scene of the day. The director was so nice, and I loved every second of it. Within a few hours, it was over, and I was slammed back to reality.

I get a kick out of my life sometimes. I am literally learning how to act in front of cameras. My first “acting” experience has been at auditions, music video shoots and commercial shoots. I realize this makes me a total jerk…there are a lot of people who have spent hundreds, thousands, maybe more, to perfect their craft and pursue their dream. Others have toiled away night after night in community theater groups and every play, production, musical or comedy they could squeeze themselves in to. Me? I just jumped in front of a camera and happened to be standing on the left hand side.

I do feel kind of bad. Audition waiting rooms, you can generally cut the tension with a knife. Every one is likely competing for the same part, so it’s really hard to make friends. I swore from the get-go I would never be like that, and have tried to make one new friend per audition (of the 3 auditions and 2 callbacks I’ve had in my life).

My agent told me that the thing I had going for me was the fact I didn’t care. I didn’t *need* this job like some kids who have been waiting tables for ten years do. They walk in, and casting directors can smell their fear, the “I Need This” look shines through their best rendition of themselves as someone else.

Me? I see every opportunity as just that…a chance to practice. I don’t know what I’m doing, so the best I can do is just pretend I know what I’m doing. By the time I walk in to the audition room I’m already in character haha

In that sense, I’m a total jerk. I waltz in without a care in the world on the premise that this, these auditions…they’re just a cheaper way to learn how to act than paying for acting classes 😉

I’ve always thought that the key to happiness was asking yourself “If I were to die tomorrow, what would I do?” and then doing exactly that.

I asked myself that same question, and the first thing that came to mind was “Order a soy caramel machiatto (not vegan) and a lemon poppyseed loaf” (also not vegan).

There have been times in my life when I’ve fallen off the vegan-y wagon…mostly for old staples like pizza or veggie lasagna. For the better part of a decade, though, I only indulged in those dishes if they were created by me, in the comfort of my own home, with vegan cheezes and other non-dead affair.

Buuuuuuuut there was a time, I cannot lie, when eating half a pizza was one of my favourite things to do. Now, with my future on my mind, the first thing I think of is the way that icing sugar looks in those coffee shop display cases.

Why do I instantly not care about the future of the planet as soon as I start contemplating my own mortality?

Just cause I could be dying, that’s an excuse to start consuming anything and everything with no remorse whatsoever?

I care about this lil planet. Ask me why I’ve been vegetarian for 16 years and that is one thing I sometimes say. I also love little furry guys. And I care for those that inhabit this earth presently, and beyond me.

Why the hell is my dying wish to eat a god damn lemon loaf then?

This could be my last day on earth, I should be out contributing, bettering, inspiring and aiding!!! Loving and sharing and bringing hope to those hopeless. Hey! It is not so bad!!! We are all of us, currently, dying, in some sense or another.
Whether it is tomorrow, the next day or 80 years from now…you don’t know how much time YOU will get.

So what will you change?

A lot of things have beeing goingon behind the scenes that I figured I’d fill you guys in on.

It is starting to occur to me that although 2009 seemed to sometimes move like freakin molasses, I guess technically some pretty super huge things went down.

First and foremost, I got a licensing deal. This is a big deal. A licensing deal means that my music is part of a database of songs and songwriters that get “pitched” to be part of film and/or television shows.

For example, if Grey’s Anatomy needs some kind of girl folk singer thing, hey maybe one day they’ll use one of my songs. My licensing deal is is with an amazing company that has the rights to such classics as Eye of The Tiger and Low Rider and my “go-to guy” is one of the kindest and most down to earth people working in Beverly hills, I’m sure 🙂 VERY honoured, VERY lucky, and something I’ve always wanted (more than any record deal or anything that’s for sure).

Secondly, I got a manager. Yes, Ms. DIY herself is now, currently, “being managed”. This is a huge deal for me as well, for several reasons, one being that it’s the first time in my life I’m actually *letting* someone manage my life!!! It takes a huge amount of trust when you come from a world where you do everything yourself, to suddenly just hand it over to someone and hope for the best. I have to say though, I actually genuinely trust my manager. I believe he is a good person, with morals and a solid sense of what is right not only in life, but specifically in my life, and I believe that in any “bizness” dealing, that should come first. I’m so excited to (for once) have some decent help around here, especially cause lately things have been very very hectic. My brand new manager not only has his heart in the right place but he’s also (as I’m learning) an exceptional talent when it comes to new innovative perspectives on how to spread the gospel of the Lost Cause. It’s been really cool to have someone to bounce ideas off of, another brain behind Lost Records working on the game plan for the coming months. Exciting 🙂

Third, I got an acting agent! Kind of on a whim (and at the suggestion of several friends and family members) I decided I wanted to get (back in) to acting. Let me be clear, my “experience” consists of: a play I wrote and starred in when I was 12 called “The Avon Lady Goes to The Moon” (in French Immersion, no less), a non-smoking commercial when I was 7, a few Christmas plays and some home videos where my dad would set up the camera and I would act out all the characters of The Little Mermaid, song, dance, and all (I know, you wish you had a copy of that haha).

Of other exciting news, I just got approved for an O-1 work visa. This means I can legally work in the United States and cross the border to play shows, no hassle. Kind of a huge freakin deal, and something that you stress out about a lot when you’re in a band. As a side note, the technical name of the visa is “Alien of Extraordinary Ability”, which is just hilarious 😉

So that’s my year! Coming up, there’s talk of playing a charity event in India, the Vancouver Olympics, a new album, some Canadian tour dates and maybe even opening for a few heavy weights. And that’s only the beginning…

Random Fact of the Day: My favourite vegan restaurant in Calgary is Buddha’s Veggie House and I wish I could Fedex myself some of their veggie ginger beef right…now…

You don’t need anyone to make you happy
Just know who you are and what you will always do
If you spent your life alone, following this meandering path, wouldn’t that be enough?
Wouldn’t it be enough to find your own way?
This world is too big
This life too short
To spend one moment unhappy or one moment regretting anything
I see the triumphs and downfalls in the people around me
Some shackled to the life they’ve created
Some freed by it
I can’t tell you how inspiring it was to have met you

I have to tell you something quickly that just made me cry…

All week I’ve been getting messages on my Yogi tea bags that are just so fitting. For example, at one point I thought to myself “that’s it…I can never love anyone again…” And just as I thought it, I opened a tea and it read: “Life is a flow of love. Your participation is requested.” It made me laugh 🙂

Some other teas I got this week include: “Life is a chance. Love is infinity. Grace is reality”, “let things come to you” (got this on the day Raine approved licensing deal right as I was gonna email him) and “compassion has no limit. Kindness has no enemy.”

It’s at the point where I get all excited about the tea, and know it’s gonna be perfect for the moment.

Just boiled some water and actually thought out loud “bet ya this will be a good one today…”

Know what it says?

“Live for each other.”

I love tea. 🙂

Random Fact of the Now: I have recently become obsessed with Improv Comedy and I highly recommend you do the same.